"The Savage Deyes Of A Commitment-Phobe - Part 20

[BambiEyes]

VLOG: ITS NOT THE VIDEO YOU'RE THINKING

- It wasn't the Zoella aka my gf controls my day. Just a shitty update like he's Obama and we've been wondering where he is

- "I released new merch. It was insane" --- that's why it took longer than a day to sell out

- "Collections will be monthly. But not at the beginning of the month" -- of course. Then it will be every 2 months. Then quarterly. Then never.

- "Me and mum won raffle tickets for Wimbledon 7 years ago. We saw a big tennis player. But I've forgotten, it was 7 years ago. But we are strawberries and cream" --- of course he didn't take in the privilege of getting tickets in the raffle (I've never been lucky) and now he gets FREE tickets. The only good thing I can say is he took his mum. Then again he only has paid friends so guess they were busy.

- He was given VIP tickets. So saw Federer and Serena Williams. I'm actually jealous. And he called his seat "savage" and was shouting "Get it" because that's all the training she needs. Alfie shouting get it.

- He's had multiple #ADs in the last couple days. He had one today with Insomnia Gaming Fest. He's been invited and doing a free meet and greet. His popularity must be fading
Also. HE'S NOT A GAMER YOUTUBER.

- LOL he car had a flat tyre. So of course he didn't change it. Holly did.

-

[toryvilla]

Jaackmaate now has more views than him over the last 30 days according to socialblade, that must kill him!

Of course it's partly due to deleting the 1 pound video, but still this big YouTuber ain't that big anymore and gets less relevant with every day

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[Cushtybert]

Oh god I’m going to insomnia gaming festival on the day he’s going to be there. I brought tickets to take my son to it, luckily for me he has no interest in the frog so at least I don’t have to que up to meet him

[shite+++]

Few posters left. Yep 414, FOUR HUNDRED AND FOURTEEN 'only a few'. Must have failed key stage 1 maths or got a honorary degree in chatting bullshit. Probably both.

[HaleyBoBailey]

He had a flat tire and had to have Holly come and help him. He also didn't have any tools in his car to change a tire, rofl. What a fool.

I love that Holly is more of a man than he is. Lmao. Not even more of a man, really... like, more of an adult... an adult with common sense and real life skills.


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[kmare91]

He had a flat tire and had to have Holly come and help him. He also didn't have any tools in his car to change a tire, rofl. What a fool.

I love that Holly is more of a man than he is. Lmao. Not even more of a man, really... like, more of an adult... an adult with common sense and real life skills.


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I also feel like he only told her "thank you" when they got in the car and on camera just out of the manners he uses only when filming, but I feel like he was ungrateful apart from that. I love how he's all " Holly's just helping me get some things going", no, Holly's doing ALL the work there is to do.

Now to Wimbledon...
When the end of one of the matches was over, he actually stood up and went "O-HoH-HOIiii"... so just taken his original oi, and elongated it into what's supposed to be a sincere and proper form of shock and congratulations. How humiliating. It gave me a good laugh, anyways.

Now he's like Tanya, retweeting and absolutely LIVING in the fact that he was photographed in proximity to people who actual matter. Next maybe he'll reach out to someone on IG and try to make pals?

I DIED at Bambi up above saying " as if that's all the training she needs. Alfie saying get it". I'm rolling.

[Hem848484]

[youtube][/youtube]

OT, but I thought you guys would enjoy this since we talk about how Allie is always filming when he shouldn’t be filming. This lawyer/vlogger discusses the legalities of filming/photographing someone in public without their permission.

[scruffythebone]

[youtube][/youtube]

OT, but I thought you guys would enjoy this since we talk about how Allie is always filming when he shouldn’t be filming. This lawyer/vlogger discusses the legalities of filming/photographing someone in public without their permission.

It would largely be country specific. I'm a street photographer and where I live you can take pictures freely of people in public and even print and publish them. In certain countries like France, a whole different set of parameters is involved in which street photography has largely been killed off due to draconian privacy laws.

[toryvilla]

Alfie is stupid is fuck, in general but especially, when it comes to using other people's images. Several times he's taken a sly instastory of someone just to mock them with their face fully visible. Then the next week supports some anti bullying campain.

He lost over 800 subs with the last upload. He'll be under 4 million subs by the end of the year at this rate. He deserves to have his channel tank.

[Guest]

What's up with the title of his new video? "ITs NoT tHe ViDeO yOu’Re ThInKiNg"
Does he thinks that makes him cool/funny? It only makes him look like a bigger douchebag.

[thehippiechick]

Such a douche canoe. I swear this last upload...

I agree he deserves to have his channel tank.

[thehippiechick]

Also? If there were a DBW club (DISLIKE before watching) I'd be on board for that. No You Tuber makes me want to dislike a video before watching it more than Alfie... his thumbnails alone do that.

[GetRichFromLies]

No surprise he didn't have Zoe choose what he does all day. She'd want him to -

Stop ignoring her
At least be a little bit affectionate
Stop spending her money on expensive rubbish he won't use
Stop looking at hot young women on instagram whilst he's sitting next to her
Stop cutting her off whilst she's talking
Stop looking so bored in her vlogs
Give her as much love as he does Nala
Stop embarrassing her with his rubbish content
Stop being so lazy and encouraging her to be so lazy, sitting in their filth, overeating and generally wasting their youth

They probably had a massive row about it and he cancelled the video. Or he just couldn't be bothered and sat on his steadily widening butt all day as he'd had two very busy days shopping and eating with Morgan.

[HaleyBoBailey]

Oh come on...

If he let Zoe choose his day, she’d have him spend it with her slumped on the couch re-watching the three movies she has had on rotation since 2012, ordering pizza or Nando’s for delivery. If they do make it out of the house, it will be to go to the garden center.

The End.


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[justmiss]

From what he described she would jut choose A or B, not knowing what they mean. He has to be sure they won't end up married and pregnant by the end of the day.

[GetRichFromLies]

No surprise he didn't have Zoe choose what he does all day. She'd want him to -

Stop ignoring her
At least be a little bit affectionate
Stop spending her money on expensive rubbish he won't use
Stop looking at hot young women on instagram whilst he's sitting next to her
Stop cutting her off whilst she's talking
Stop looking so bored in her vlogs
Give her as much love as he does Nala
Stop embarrassing her with his rubbish content
Stop being so lazy and encouraging her to be so lazy, sitting in their filth, overeating and generally wasting their youth

They probably had a massive row about it and he cancelled the video. Or he just couldn't be bothered and sat on his steadily widening butt all day as he'd had two very busy days shopping and eating with Morgan.

Just to clarify, this was a joke. Awkward!

[BambiEyes]

VLOG: GIRLFRIEND CONTROLS MY DAY

- So Zoe drove him to town then Alfie went off with Morgan. I thought Zoe controls your life. He didn't even spend the day with her.

- "I believe in the law of attraction" -- banged on how he's gonna be savage ripped as he believes it lol

- So Zoe controlling his life is her waxing his legs, zipwiring, a caricature -- this "controlling" seems fake as he did everything he wanted

- LOL at Alfie not knowing how to open a locker and Morgan having to do it.

- He's so obnoxious. A guy is busting and he HAS to film himself throwing in a £5

- OK it got a little funny when Zoe took over. When Zoe suggested buy me underwear or buy Poppy. Lol. Alfie avoided doing it.
But I find it interesting he said "I've never bought Zoe underwear. I bought her Calvin Klein once but no sexy ones" -- their sex life is so DEAD.

- EWW at Alfie in his pants getting waxed

[thehippiechick]

Got as far as the drug store and clicked out. Already, he's buying waxing strips for Zoe to wax his hair... but someone on TWITTER suggested that and it's Zoe controlling your day not anyone on Twitter so yeah no you nimrod.

I'm off to read the recap above me. LOL

EDIT: Reading the recap and skipping around the vlog, Zoe didn't control shit.

[Luk20]

I guess he's just straight up lying to himself now about a gym body? After months and months of (supposedly) working out there have been no noticeable results - if anything, I'd guess he's put on a bit of weight from all of the over-eating and junk food. It's not like Alife to pretend he cares about something on camera and then do nothing about it though ...

[Hem848484]

^i don’t think he understands that strength gains don’t equate mass gains and you have to be really smart about actually changing your physique.