Is my relationship over?

[orangepipzz]

Hi everyone,

I need some advice on my relationship.

I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years and have lived with him for the last year. Everything was really great until about 6-8 months ago. We just constantly argue about little things, we don't really cuddle or hold hands anymore and our sex life is non existent at the moment. I still want to be with him and improve our relationship but I don't know how.

I have quite a lot of body hang ups and insecurities that really get to me. I have an ex boyfriend who was my first love and my first everything. We were together for almost 3 years and we broke up 5 years ago. He has been dating a new girl for the last 2-ish years and I get insanely jealous over it. Like so jealous I feel a sick feeling in my gut and get really sad and down about him being with another girl. I don't know why I feel like that. I don't love my ex and we broke up for a reason, so I'm not sure why I still go on his social media and his new girlfriends to look at what they're doing!

Help! I really need some advice. I don't want to ruin my 3 year relationship with my current boyfriend because I still think of an ex from 5 years ago who broke my heart!

Thanks.

[gakawak]

One of my secrets to a happy marriage is always thinking of the other person's wants and needs (as long as they are also taking yours into consideration). When you are jealous of this ex, you are putting your current boyfriend last behind you and the ex and his new girlfriend. That is a crappy place to be.

I'd suggest redoubling your efforts to be invested in your relationship and do special things for your boyfriend. If he doesn't reciprocate after some time or things don't improve, then you need to evaluate the fate of your relationship.

[Hushhhush]

GIRLLLLL, it ain't normal if you are "over" your ex and yet still feel really jealous about him moving on and getting a new girl. Meanwhile, your current boyfriend might sense that you are still holding on to your ex when you stalk your ex's social media. I mean can you imagine your current boyfriend stalking his ex girlfriend's social media? My advice for you is: Don't do anything but rather sit down and THINK of who you truly love and want. Good luck!

[orangepipzz]

Thanks for both of your comments. I am in a really shite place right now and I am seeing a therapist. When I get down about things going on in my life/relationship, I always look back on my ex as I was happier then in myself. My therapist thinks that I attach my happy memories and times to my ex, so she is going to try and help me break that bond.

I'm starting to arrange more exciting things for me and my boyfriend to do together for date nights/days that will hopefully put the spark back into our relationship!

[Hushhhush]

Upon hearing this, I am glad you sorted it out that way and wishing you all the best!!!