SEX! Part 2: Fornication Station

[Diorette]

is anyone else scared of getting pregnant? im extremely scared of it and think its keeping me from enjoying sex, i take bc and wear condoms but one time my bf came inside and he wasnt wearing a condom and i freaked out and i ended up taking plan b just to make sure.. im in college so i guess thats why im scared

[TiffanyMaxwell]

This thread hasn't been too active lately, but I'm looking for some advice since I'm new to sex and don't really have anyone to ask.

So my boyfriend and I have been together for five months, and he's my first relationship and sexual partner (I had only made out with one guy before him). I've been going down on him for about three months now, and we've been having PIV sex for about two. In the entire time he's never tried to go down on me or offered to, I thought reciprocating oral sex was common practice, but since he never did I just assumed that he didn't like doing it. I finally asked him about it a couple days ago and he confirmed that he doesn't like doing it. He asked me if it would be a problem, and I said "well I just wanted to try it at least once..." and he did say that he would let me try it.

BUT, now I'm wondering if I should even bother... Cause if I end up liking it, I won't continue getting it from him cause he doesn't like doing it...

Does anyone have any thoughts?

I guess it depends on how important it is for you. I get that you haven't received oral ever, so you don't know how it would feel for you but to some extent, it is clear that this is something that is more or less pleasurable to 99% of women. A lot of women cannot orgasm without that or some hand work, so you have to figure that out as well. It is likely that you won't feel satisfied if you cannot come regularly through penetration (which is very normal!), which means he would have to help with his hands or you'd do it yourself, which again means you have to figure that out too - if that is enough for you.

On the other hand of course, if somebody does not want to do oral then they don't have to. Even if you do it on him (unless he is telling you that you are obligated to do it on him but he won't do it on you), it does not mean he should be doing the same. Not everybody likes the same stuff. You may wana ask him why he does not want to do it, what are his concerns - maybe he has tried it before and had a bad experience with an ex girlfriend. Communication is key. At the end of the day, if you cannot find a solution, you have to see what else might work for you that you both are comfortable doing and is pleasurable to you.

[NirvanaxSunbeam]

This thread hasn't been too active lately, but I'm looking for some advice since I'm new to sex and don't really have anyone to ask.

So my boyfriend and I have been together for five months, and he's my first relationship and sexual partner (I had only made out with one guy before him). I've been going down on him for about three months now, and we've been having PIV sex for about two. In the entire time he's never tried to go down on me or offered to, I thought reciprocating oral sex was common practice, but since he never did I just assumed that he didn't like doing it. I finally asked him about it a couple days ago and he confirmed that he doesn't like doing it. He asked me if it would be a problem, and I said "well I just wanted to try it at least once..." and he did say that he would let me try it.

BUT, now I'm wondering if I should even bother... Cause if I end up liking it, I won't continue getting it from him cause he doesn't like doing it...

Does anyone have any thoughts?

I guess it depends on how important it is for you. I get that you haven't received oral ever, so you don't know how it would feel for you but to some extent, it is clear that this is something that is more or less pleasurable to 99% of women. A lot of women cannot orgasm without that or some hand work, so you have to figure that out as well. It is likely that you won't feel satisfied if you cannot come regularly through penetration (which is very normal!), which means he would have to help with his hands or you'd do it yourself, which again means you have to figure that out too - if that is enough for you.

On the other hand of course, if somebody does not want to do oral then they don't have to. Even if you do it on him (unless he is telling you that you are obligated to do it on him but he won't do it on you), it does not mean he should be doing the same. Not everybody likes the same stuff. You may wana ask him why he does not want to do it, what are his concerns - maybe he has tried it before and had a bad experience with an ex girlfriend. Communication is key. At the end of the day, if you cannot find a solution, you have to see what else might work for you that you both are comfortable doing and is pleasurable to you.

Oh I totally understand that no one is obligated to do anything they don't want to. My issue here is that he said he would do it for me so I can at least try it, but I don't think I want him to anymore cause I don't see what the point would be.

I think my problem has more to do with the sentiment behind the act, rather than the act itself. Like I go down on him because I love how much he loves it, and I want to make him feel good, and this is making me worry that he doesn't care as much about my pleasure as I do about his. But I will ask him about it again, and why he doesn't like doing it. I'm probably overthinking this... but I'm still new to this lol.