Advice on breakup/losing friends

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momkilledmyorchid
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Advice on breakup/losing friends

Post by momkilledmyorchid » Sun Jun 01, 2014 4:41 pm

I'm a long time lurker but I finally decided to make a post. A few months ago my ex and I broke up (after two years and a half of dating) and I've been having a really hard time getting over it. I've accepted the fact that we are no longer together, but the fact that he might already be with someone else is killing me. Another thing that has been killing me is that my friends have been ignoring me, especially one of my best friends since sophomore year of high school (I'm a junior in college now). I've tried to start conversations with her but she always responds really short messages and only will text me if she really needs to. I've been so depressed lately. I feel like when my ex broke up with me, my friends did too. I'm such a mess. Most of my days are spent laying in bed and I have been lacking a lot of motivation to do anything. I go to counseling through my university and it has been a great help, but I just feel so lonely and depressed. Do you have any advice for me on what to do? A lot of times I feel like just giving up on life.

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Re: Advice on breakup/losing friends

Post by Pewpew » Sun Jun 01, 2014 7:35 pm

When I had my breakup yeah it honestly felt like the worst thing that could happen to me and I thought I could never get over it, but as cliche as this is, time heals you!!

I gradually learned to accept the fact that we are not going to be together again and I look forward to other things to do with my life. I also made it straight to him and myself that we will cut all contact with each other. I got a job and school really occupied me. I also met some new people - through a friend and at school and it really takes your mind off problems.

A little ramble on about my life, but what I'm trying to get at is, stop thinking about the past and just keep going. Cut him out of your life, talk to new people, join clubs at college, occupy yourself! These are such common advices but it's exactly because they work which is why they're cliche. And also if you're the type to always check on his name on FB and see what's he up to on any social platform, stop!! I did that, and when I cut back and eventually stopped, it really got my mind off of him and helped me with moving on as well.

As for your friends, make initiative to hangout with them. Tell them to come out and chill, get Starbucks, have study dates, and if it really bothers you, confront to them about your problems. Work through it together because right now you seem to need.

Be strong and what you need now is support so confide to your friends! Work out your problems you seem to be having with them and if they're being total asshats about it, make new ones! You'll be surprise at the people you meet outside your circle!

I'm honestly not the best person at advice but I really hope even one sentence out of my essay here can help you in any little bit of way and feel free to PM me with anything if you want to talk!!

momkilledmyorchid
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Re: Advice on breakup/losing friends

Post by momkilledmyorchid » Sun Jun 01, 2014 7:41 pm

@pewpew How do I private message you? I have no idea how to work my way around here lol

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Re: Advice on breakup/losing friends

Post by Pewpew » Sun Jun 01, 2014 8:55 pm

momkilledmyorchid wrote:@pewpew How do I private message you? I have no idea how to work my way around here lol
I PM'd you!

Usually you can PM by just pressing that PM button underneath my picture :)

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