How can I fix this situation with a guy I like?

[kayscupcake4513]

Hey!
let me start this by collectively stating that I've only ever spoken to guys, and it hasn't gone any further than that, so any and all advice is welcome.

I am an 18-year-old college freshman who just moved out about a month and a half ago to a town 2 hours away. I was looking forward to college for new experiences and maybe the possibility of meeting suitable guys, as I hadn't found that in high school. Within the first week of college, I discovered, the college boys here just weren't for me. They drank far too much and were only focused on getting with girls, which is something I'm just not into.
However, I began talking to a boy I met back home. He is 21 and seemed perfect. We really opened up to one another and he told me things about his personal life that he hadn't told anyone, saying that he really trusts me and feels comfortable, and I for one, felt the same way. We had met in person many times before but hadn't hung out, so I planned on going home to hang out with him one weekend, and he said he'd come to my university to see me the next. He knows I haven't ever had a boyfriend and said he wouldn't do anything to hurt me, and we agreed on being exclusive, which for me, isn't too hard to do, and I assured him of this. I asked what we were going to do on our date, and he said he wanted to adventure, and then cuddle and watch a movie, in which I said no cuddling please, just hanging out. Initially, he accepted this, and I was really happy he wasn't pressuring me as I haven't done as much as even kiss, which he also knows.
So, the time comes for me to come home. We hadn't had official plans, but at 9 am on Sunday he asks if I wanted to still hang out, and I said yes, but what are we going to do? Everything is closed, would you like to go for a walk? And he said I'm not really up for that right now, want to come over and watch a movie? With that, I nicely explained how that made me uncomfortable the first time we hung out, and that I've never been to a guys house before, so if he didn't feel like going out, that was fine and suggested we talk on the phone instead. He asked why I didn't want to come over, and again, I stated as I did before and with that he didn't answer me. So, I apologized (which I SHOULDNT HAVE DONE IN RETROSPECT) and again no answer.
The next day, my best friend Sean asked if I wanted to go to the movies with him, and I said yeah, sure. I texted the guy I am "seeing?" and told him I was going out with Sean, and to not think of it as a date or something, just in case he got the idea I was ditching him for Sean. I felt a little bad after that because I didn't extend the invitation to him, but he didn't answer the night before, so I thought it was whatever. I went back to school the next day, and we hadn't spoken for a few days, so I apologized again like 2 times and with that, he saw the messages and responded days later saying "It's cool...." and I asked to talk about it, and all he said was "It's whatever, it felt like you didn't trust me." And I said I did, I just didn't feel like that was appropriate and he said "I understand." But would barely open up and doesn't talk to me now, and if it does its with barely any substance. I asked him why and wanted to talk about it to make him comfortable, and assure him that I do like him, and nothing. Every other time something came up, we'd talk about it and it'd be over but for some reason he's completely ignoring me.
I know what you're thinking, "Scrap this guy." It's what my friend told me, but quite frankly, I dont really want to. I really liked him and he liked me just as much if not more, so I wanna work it out. We havent spoken in about 3 days, and he didnt reply to my messages. I know I didnt do anything wrong, I will never put myself in an uncomforable situation, but I feel like I bruised this guys ego a bit maybe. He knows I will not hook up and said he didnt want to because I'm not ready and I felt like that was genuine. I can't make him respond, but I just need advice on what to do/say in regards on how to fix this mess. This boy is someone I connect with and feel comforable talking to. We share alot of common goals and interests, and for once, everything felt right. I really would like that back.

Thanks!

[YouslessTube]

Don't keep saying sorry via text, you've not made any grave mistakes. Him acting cold means that he now wants you to come over. He probably wanted to hook up, well not have sex you know but at least cuddle which would lead to a kiss or two. But at the same time he might be confused, you mentioned that you're going out with a male friend & told him to not be jealous means you're dating him right? He might find it weird that his new girlfriend isn't ready to even cuddle. But it's your body so if you don't feel comfortable you don't need to even hug him. You know what I'm saying? You guys connect well and all that but when it comes to the 'dating' part you both want different things - you don't want to cuddle/kiss whereas he wants to. Don't give up your body or virginity if YOU don't want to. Maybe tell him via text that you're not ready to get physical as of now & it will take (how-many-ever) days, weeks, months etc (you want) for you to get comfortable.

[kayscupcake4513]

Don't keep saying sorry via text, you've not made any grave mistakes. Him acting cold means that he now wants you to come over. He probably wanted to hook up, well not have sex you know but at least cuddle which would lead to a kiss or two. But at the same time he might be confused, you mentioned that you're going out with a male friend & told him to not be jealous means you're dating him right? He might find it weird that his new girlfriend isn't ready to even cuddle. But it's your body so if you don't feel comfortable you don't need to even hug him. You know what I'm saying? You guys connect well and all that but when it comes to the 'dating' part you both want different things - you don't want to cuddle/kiss whereas he wants to. Don't give up your body or virginity if YOU don't want to. Maybe tell him via text that you're not ready to get physical as of now & it will take (how-many-ever) days, weeks, months etc (you want) for you to get comfortable.

hey! Thanks for your reply, it means a lot. And Actually no, I am not dating him, but we agreed on not seeing other people, which is why I told him about how I was going out with my male friend the next day. A few weeks earlier he got upset because my gay friend kissed me on the head on snapchat, and posted it, in which he saw, and didnt talk to me for days on end as well, but we discussed it and came to the conclusion that it was fine, and promptly moved on from that. The guy I am "seeing" wasnt my boyfriend, he wanted me to come over to his house at night for the first date, and now is acting strange after i nicely said no. Tried to move on and talk to him about it, and even said recently "just tell me if you dont wanna be friends anymore, I have alot to tell you and I'm just excited about life and I want you in it, unless you want me to take the hint." and again nothing. Hasnt responded in a few days now.

[YouslessTube]

You're welcome. Girl. I've been there. There was this really cute guy & I liked him, I said it to him & he told me word to word = "I've always liked you too" on the first date. Time went on & we met about 3-4 times in 1 month but knew each other for a year, he invited me to his place over the weekend & when I went to his place, he tried getting close & hooking up, I said if you want to get physical I need to be in a relationship with you first or else no kissing or anything, he got so mad for some reason telling me he has to concentrate on his career & has no time for a relationship. Then, this guy had the balls to tell me that we should make out & have sex, then maybe he will think about being my bf. I said I'm not comfortable with that & I straight up left, deleted & blocked him.
Your friend is being cold because he knows you like him a lot, he knows if you like him enough you'll put your guard down & he will get what he wants. There's no reason for him to act distant, is there? Does he have a family problem? Depression? Did he not pass his exams? Did you say/do something to make him mad? If there's nothing that comes to mind, even when you were upfront & honest & told him via text he still didn't respond it clearly means he wanted to get in your pants & that's the cold hard truth.

[kayscupcake4513]

You're welcome. Girl. I've been there. There was this really cute guy & I liked him, I said it to him & he told me word to word = "I've always liked you too" on the first date. Time went on & we met about 3-4 times in 1 month but knew each other for a year, he invited me to his place over the weekend & when I went to his place, he tried getting close & hooking up, I said if you want to get physical I need to be in a relationship with you first or else no kissing or anything, he got so mad for some reason telling me he has to concentrate on his career & has no time for a relationship. Then, this guy had the balls to tell me that we should make out & have sex, then maybe he will think about being my bf. I said I'm not comfortable with that & I straight up left, deleted & blocked him.
Your friend is being cold because he knows you like him a lot, he knows if you like him enough you'll put your guard down & he will get what he wants. There's no reason for him to act distant, is there? Does he have a family problem? Depression? Did he not pass his exams? Did you say/do something to make him mad? If there's nothing that comes to mind, even when you were upfront & honest & told him via text he still didn't respond it clearly means he wanted to get in your pants & that's the cold hard truth.

That definitely sucks for sure, and it's the worst feeling, but for me it happens every single time a guy likes me. It's unfortunate but i don't take it to heart anymore. And yea, he does have some mental health issues, but it doesn't excuse the way he is treating me, and ignoring me. Should I just assume we wont talk again? Or kinda play it as I go and assume eventually in a few weeks he will get over it and we'll be cool again? I really have no idea how this works, but guys are pretty moody.

[YouslessTube]

Should I just assume we wont talk again? Or kinda play it as I go and assume eventually in a few weeks he will get over it and we'll be cool again? I really have no idea how this works, but guys are pretty moody.

If he's not replying at all since 6-7 days but reading your messages & is active on social media means he's not interested in speaking to you. But he may contact you out of the blue. Some guys are moody, you're right. As of now there's a few things you can do to get closure. Since he's not replying to texts, call him & maybe from another number. Do you both have a common friend? If yes then contact them to pass on your message & ask for a reply. Contact his bro/sis. This is a little extreme, but if you really want an answer show up outside his school/college & politely confront him. (It won't be creepy since you've already met & you've not done anything that should make him stop talking to you) I understand tho, it bloody sucks to be ghosted. Idk how someone can be lovey-dovey one moment & straight up ignore the next moment!

[creepycupcakegoth]

As much as it may hurt, you're better off trying to move on. You deserve better.

[kayscupcake4513]

As much as it may hurt, you're better off trying to move on. You deserve better.

Thank You