Christian "Keeping UP with the Blackketters" Guzman - Part 4

[Palumbofit]

Best thread name so far!

[CheetoDustGreyhound]

Lol nice name!

[LemonadeGrenade]

Tim and CG must have had a falling out cause he's never in the videos or insta posts anymore. Like I know we don't see much of Derek cause he's always working but if you've watched any of Tim's channel he's a complete fame whore and definitely not someone burning the midnight oil to get a job done.

[Sheabutter]

loving the thread name.

[spilledmytea]

Tim and CG must have had a falling out cause he's never in the videos or insta posts anymore. Like I know we don't see much of Derek cause he's always working but if you've watched any of Tim's channel he's a complete fame whore and definitely not someone burning the midnight oil to get a job done.

good. Tim is the biggest fuckboy of the entire Alphalete crew and it's not even close.

[Dmvfitness]

This thread title made me laugh out loud for a solid minute.

[Healthyish85]

I liked Tim way back in the day when he was just a dork and he and Nikki would nerd out over Harry Potter and he just seemed down to earth. he is my least favorite for sure now, he and hoang i can't even hate follow because the cringe is so strong. shawley is boring af but at least he can be kinda funny at times.

cg hasnt' even released his big summer shredding video and i'm already annoyed with it. i didn't think anything could top his dramatics last year but hold my beer i guess.

[OmegaBetaZeta]

Anyone bored and want to do cliffnotes on Christians friends? I really only know about Maxx

[Heidi_hohoho]

I liked Tim way back in the day when he was just a dork and he and Nikki would nerd out over Harry Potter and he just seemed down to earth. he is my least favorite for sure now, he and hoang i can't even hate follow because the cringe is so strong. shawley is boring af but at least he can be kinda funny at times.

cg hasnt' even released his big summer shredding video and i'm already annoyed with it. i didn't think anything could top his dramatics last year but hold my beer i guess.

YES I thought I was the only one. This whole buildup to this video that's apparently going to be the best of his channel has been annoying as hell. Like we all know it's just going to be the same overly-edited, dramatic lighting, drone shots like usual. The only difference between CG and other people out there is that he has the money for better equipment. Creativity-wise, he's no different than the hundreds of thousands of people out there trying to make it in the film industry

[Bootyguru2]

Really glad I’m not the only one annoyed with him over-hyping it. Did anyone follow his summer shredding last year all the way through? I’m embarrassed to say I did, but it really was like a reality tv show. I just couldn’t pull my eyes from it. Between his stupid rants and motivational speeches that are more or less about the same thing using different wording, it wasn’t anything special.
Also, side note.. I know YouTube is changing their algorithm and stuff, but if you look at the years he was YouTubing with Nikki and now with Heidi... his views have dropped significantly. I’d love to think it’s just bc he fucked Nikki over and is now with Heidi ho

[Healthyish85]

Really glad I’m not the only one annoyed with him over-hyping it. Did anyone follow his summer shredding last year all the way through? I’m embarrassed to say I did, but it really was like a reality tv show. I just couldn’t pull my eyes from it. Between his stupid rants and motivational speeches that are more or less about the same thing using different wording, it wasn’t anything special.
Also, side note.. I know YouTube is changing their algorithm and stuff, but if you look at the years he was YouTubing with Nikki and now with Heidi... his views have dropped significantly. I’d love to think it’s just bc he fucked Nikki over and is now with Heidi ho

i imagine that's part of it but honestly i think his content just sucks overall. even his workout footage is blah...i think spid kept track for a while of what he worked and lower body was like one time out of 10 lol i just don't have an interest in seeing him talk about another new car or house or do a rant on how to be a great businessman like him or some speech with a white board. top that with his personality change (he's like a hyper little dog now), douchey bffs and bb...nopers. i get way too much pleasure out of his YT still being demonetized

[spilledmytea]

Anyone bored and want to do cliffnotes on Christians friends? I really only know about Maxx

- TIm: Basically the OG Alphalete. In the beginning, it was really CG and TIm. They definitely aren't as close personally anymore, though Tim has a fairly important (sounding) position at the gym now. Tim used to look fairly normal (though he went through a period where he had a really weird haircut that commenters liked to say was him trying to hide his hairline), but now appears to have fully embraced the Fuck Boy Kit, complete with really young girlfriend. He also has a daughter from a previous relationship, I believe.

- Shawley: Has his moments, but isn't sharp at all. He might not even be dumb, but he's totally the guy you'd zing and he'd just sit there with the deer in the headlights look as he tries to formulate a comeback. Also has that look when he's filming himself and has to say more than three consecutive sentences. Has weird abs.

- Joe: The only Alpahalete guy who's not into fitness. He's CG's roommate and I believe is an engineer or something equally dorky. Has his own YT channel dedicated to cars. Appears to come from a LOT of money. Looks like a grown up version of Smalls from the Sandlot.

- Derek: The glue of the backend of Alphalete. Probably the hardest working member as he's in the warehouse keeping it all together all day. Some have suggested there's tension between CG and Derek and his wife over this.

- Hoang: Fringe friend, really. Decent physique, but he's like the Asian version of Shawley in that you'll never hear him get more than a few sentences out without an awkward pause. Comes from money and is constantly starting new ventures that flame out within a few months. He's doing jewelry right now. Has a stagnant YouTube channel and chubby fiance he constantly calls "baby girl."

- Russel: He's a sponsored Alphalete guy so he's not really a FRIEND of CG. Probably the realest guy you'll ever see in CG's videos. Excellent powerlifter, funny, engaging, and seems to stay out of the drama. Probably on gear at one point. Excellent pancake flipping skills.

- Becca: People love her because she's not Heidi. Kinda boring. Makes you wanna sing "Let it Go" everytime you see her face because that shit is FROZEN from botox or something.

[Healthyish85]

Anyone bored and want to do cliffnotes on Christians friends? I really only know about Maxx

- TIm: Basically the OG Alphalete. In the beginning, it was really CG and TIm. They definitely aren't as close personally anymore, though Tim has a fairly important (sounding) position at the gym now. Tim used to look fairly normal (though he went through a period where he had a really weird haircut that commenters liked to say was him trying to hide his hairline), but now appears to have fully embraced the Fuck Boy Kit, complete with really young girlfriend. He also has a daughter from a previous relationship, I believe.

- Shawley: Has his moments, but isn't sharp at all. He might not even be dumb, but he's totally the guy you'd zing and he'd just sit there with the deer in the headlights look as he tries to formulate a comeback. Also has that look when he's filming himself and has to say more than three consecutive sentences. Has weird abs.

- Joe: The only Alpahalete guy who's not into fitness. He's CG's roommate and I believe is an engineer or something equally dorky. Has his own YT channel dedicated to cars. Appears to come from a LOT of money. Looks like a grown up version of Smalls from the Sandlot.

- Derek: The glue of the backend of Alphalete. Probably the hardest working member as he's in the warehouse keeping it all together all day. Some have suggested there's tension between CG and Derek and his wife over this.

- Hoang: Fringe friend, really. Decent physique, but he's like the Asian version of Shawley in that you'll never hear him get more than a few sentences out without an awkward pause. Comes from money and is constantly starting new ventures that flame out within a few months. He's doing jewelry right now. Has a stagnant YouTube channel and chubby fiance he constantly calls "baby girl."

- Russel: He's a sponsored Alphalete guy so he's not really a FRIEND of CG. Probably the realest guy you'll ever see in CG's videos. Excellent powerlifter, funny, engaging, and seems to stay out of the drama. Probably on gear at one point. Excellent pancake flipping skills.

- Becca: People love her because she's not Heidi. Kinda boring. Makes you wanna sing "Let it Go" everytime you see her face because that shit is FROZEN from botox or something.

LMAO!!!! yes to all this, can't stop laughing at Becca's (so true).

I always forget about Russel because he's so cool and genuinely likable compared to the others.

I checked Hoang's YT just because i haven't in a million years and this is his latest from five days ago...the title...the comments. omg. dude. stop.

[Nixe24]

@spilledmytea LOL
I never paid much attention to any of them. Obviously they're all fairly boring.
CG should cast some new and more polarizing characters for the upcoming "season" of summer shredding.

[Spid]

I liked Tim way back in the day when he was just a dork and he and Nikki would nerd out over Harry Potter and he just seemed down to earth. he is my least favorite for sure now, he and hoang i can't even hate follow because the cringe is so strong. shawley is boring af but at least he can be kinda funny at times.

cg hasnt' even released his big summer shredding video and i'm already annoyed with it. i didn't think anything could top his dramatics last year but hold my beer i guess.

YES I thought I was the only one. This whole buildup to this video that's apparently going to be the best of his channel has been annoying as hell. Like we all know it's just going to be the same overly-edited, dramatic lighting, drone shots like usual. The only difference between CG and other people out there is that he has the money for better equipment. Creativity-wise, he's no different than the hundreds of thousands of people out there trying to make it in the film industry

The hype is the same every year - "this is going to be the biggest and most epic summer shredding to date. I'm going to bring my best physique ever and I hope you do too, etc etc"

I'd love it if it did terrible views, it'd be hilarious after so much build up. Is this Matt photographer new? I wonder why he's using him and not Kelvin (he's back in town isn't he?)

Anyone bored and want to do cliffnotes on Christians friends? I really only know about Maxx

- Russel: He's a sponsored Alphalete guy so he's not really a FRIEND of CG. Probably the realest guy you'll ever see in CG's videos. Excellent powerlifter, funny, engaging, and seems to stay out of the drama. Probably on gear at one point. Excellent pancake flipping skills.

Aren't Shawley, Daniel and Russell all 'sponsored' but not really sponsored? Like they get free Alphalete shit and maybe a token payment but are ever taken on tours.

[OmegaBetaZeta]

You’re the real deal spilledmytea! Thanks!!

[Spid]

Anyone bored and want to do cliffnotes on Christians friends? I really only know about Maxx

- TIm: Basically the OG Alphalete. In the beginning, it was really CG and TIm. They definitely aren't as close personally anymore, though Tim has a fairly important (sounding) position at the gym now. Tim used to look fairly normal (though he went through a period where he had a really weird haircut that commenters liked to say was him trying to hide his hairline), but now appears to have fully embraced the Fuck Boy Kit, complete with really young girlfriend. He also has a daughter from a previous relationship, I believe.

- Shawley: Has his moments, but isn't sharp at all. He might not even be dumb, but he's totally the guy you'd zing and he'd just sit there with the deer in the headlights look as he tries to formulate a comeback. Also has that look when he's filming himself and has to say more than three consecutive sentences. Has weird abs.

- Joe: The only Alpahalete guy who's not into fitness. He's CG's roommate and I believe is an engineer or something equally dorky. Has his own YT channel dedicated to cars. Appears to come from a LOT of money. Looks like a grown up version of Smalls from the Sandlot.

- Derek: The glue of the backend of Alphalete. Probably the hardest working member as he's in the warehouse keeping it all together all day. Some have suggested there's tension between CG and Derek and his wife over this.

- Hoang: Fringe friend, really. Decent physique, but he's like the Asian version of Shawley in that you'll never hear him get more than a few sentences out without an awkward pause. Comes from money and is constantly starting new ventures that flame out within a few months. He's doing jewelry right now. Has a stagnant YouTube channel and chubby fiance he constantly calls "baby girl."

- Russel: He's a sponsored Alphalete guy so he's not really a FRIEND of CG. Probably the realest guy you'll ever see in CG's videos. Excellent powerlifter, funny, engaging, and seems to stay out of the drama. Probably on gear at one point. Excellent pancake flipping skills.

- Becca: People love her because she's not Heidi. Kinda boring. Makes you wanna sing "Let it Go" everytime you see her face because that shit is FROZEN from botox or something.

A+ post

I think Joe is a coder/programmer?

Yep.

I don't know if he only works for Alphalete or does stuff for other people too.

[CheetoDustGreyhound]

The Friends of CG cliff notes was hilarious. I’ve been giggling to myself for 5 minutes.

[idontknowwhoiam]

very helpful as well, cause i didn't know any of those people haha

[nadi]

I check out Tim's instagram once every few months and every time he has a new girlfriend that he swears he's in love with, complete with photos of her walking his kid, sitting on his lap etc. Then he swaps her out.