There has been a lot of religious talk on here tonight, so why not start another topic?
I'm curious if any of you are in a relationship in which the two of you differ on the point of religion? I think it depends both on how active and how secure a person is in what he/she believes.
As a former Christian, I once knew that I could never be with someone who was not a Christian because that would be being unequally yoked. How do the Christians here feel about this? I know plenty of people who would never be with someone who wasn't a Christian. In my favorite podcast, people have called in and talked about how their marriages ended when they admitted that they had come to believe in something other than Christianity.
I'm an atheist and I ended up with another atheist. I can't imagine it any other way unless the person I was with was someone who wasn't in my face about their beliefs all the time. I guess I could be in a relationship with anyone who had an open mind and didn't try to shove beliefs down my throat.
I think it has the potential to cause serious relationship problems if this difference is ignored, especially if one of the parties involved thinks that they can change the other person's mind later on. However, I think it can also be perfectly fine if both parties are mature, open-minded people who truly love each other.
Thoughts?
Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Religion
- wanderlust
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- fossilfinger
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
I wouldn't be able to date someone who was religious because it clashes with my fundamental view of life. I'm an atheist, my husband calls himself a Buddhist, but he reads about it rather than practicing it, really. We both come from the same religious background and are non-practicing.
Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
I'm atheist and I don't think that I could date someone who is extremely religious. Like most Americans, I've grown up around very very strong believers in Christianity and many have said certain things about my atheism that bother me. I know there are a lot of people who accept atheists, but I still don't think I could date someone who was religious.
Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
Interesting, my husband also identifies as Buddhist, although he's more Buddhist/Agnostic really. He likes the Buddhist philosophy although he's a non-believer when it comes to "god," etc. As mentioned before I'm definitely an atheist.fossilfinger wrote:I wouldn't be able to date someone who was religious because it clashes with my fundamental view of life. I'm an atheist, my husband calls himself a Buddhist, but he reads about it rather than practicing it, really. We both come from the same religious background and are non-practicing.
I doubt I would have lasted long with anyone of very strong religious faith because I'd clash too often with that.
- Primadxnna
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
I'm an Apatheist basically (in Apatheism) and my boyfriend believes in God BUT he has his doubts. I honestly don't care. Just as long as he doesn't shove religion down my throat and up my ass it's fine with me When I told him that I didn't believe in God, he didn't care either. So it's fine with him, because religion isn't something THAT important to him.
- BubbleButt
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
Well in my case both me and my Boyfriend are christians. and we are pretty stable in that sense.
Though i have met a friend not so long ago, and her Boyfriend is an atheist. She says it's a bit troublesome, they tend to argue about it a lot. And i told her to try and reason with him. But he always puts her down and she somehow ends the conversation quickly. she says that even though he is the way he is, it doesn't matter.
I told her i have seen cases in couples which either the atheist becomes a christian, or the christian becomes the atheist.
I can make an example of my own parents. Both of them were atheist, well.. in a sense.. because my dad always believed in him, but did nothing about it. never went to church etc. But my mom, after they both got married she became a christian. And guess what? their relationship has been good even though of their differences.
Though i have met a friend not so long ago, and her Boyfriend is an atheist. She says it's a bit troublesome, they tend to argue about it a lot. And i told her to try and reason with him. But he always puts her down and she somehow ends the conversation quickly. she says that even though he is the way he is, it doesn't matter.
I told her i have seen cases in couples which either the atheist becomes a christian, or the christian becomes the atheist.
I can make an example of my own parents. Both of them were atheist, well.. in a sense.. because my dad always believed in him, but did nothing about it. never went to church etc. But my mom, after they both got married she became a christian. And guess what? their relationship has been good even though of their differences.
- well wait idk
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
im an atheist and i dont think i could date anyone that took religion very seriously. depending on what religion it is, it could effect how they view me as a woman.
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
I have no interest in religion or any real religious belief. I don't think I could date somebody who was passionate about religion or wanted me to go to church. It just wouldn't go well because I really have no desire at all to "know god" and I don't think dating somebody would make me have any more.
- Doctor's Companion
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
I don't think I could be in a serious relationship with someone who was religious. As an atheist, I feel that I couldn't be with someone whose fundamental beliefs differed drastically from mine.
Like, I'm fine with a fling or non-serious stuff with a religious person, but I feel that in a serious relationship there would be far too many issues (the main one being my mouth, since I cant really take any religions seriously).
Like, I'm fine with a fling or non-serious stuff with a religious person, but I feel that in a serious relationship there would be far too many issues (the main one being my mouth, since I cant really take any religions seriously).
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
I'm a Christian and I've been with an Atheist and it wasn't a big deal at all
Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
When I first got together with my husband, way back when I was 18, I was Catholic and he was atheist, but he never talked about it, and I really never talked about my religion, so it was never an issue. I eventually became atheist a few years later though, but he didn't influence my decision
- princessvoldemort
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
I'm a Roman Catholic, though not staunch, and my ex is a Wiccan. I have no problem with dating outside of my religion. Some people in my church (mostly older people) may think otherwise, but it's my life. Hell, my dad was a Protestant (Southern Baptist).
- KittenKaboost
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
I couldn't date someone who isn't Christian when what I believe is a big part of my life. I tried once before but didn't work. We just had different values. And then it also depends what denomination, although most Christians agree on certain things there are slight differences within denomination. I know people who say that girls have to wear skirts/dresses all the time. That isn't going to happen with me. Then there are also those Christians who push religion down everyone's throat and bashes people because of how they choose to live their life. Can't be with those people either.
- loopyloo
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
I'm an atheist and couldn't go out with someone who was devoutly religious (and I doubt they'd want to go out with me!). My parents were different religions so of course it can work. It is something you need to talk about a lot though, especially as religious beliefs are known to get stronger as people get older. My friend is married to someone of a different religion and it was all fine until they had their first child. Then her husband went from being Mr Compromise to Mr My Religion Is Right And That's That.
- Primadxnna
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
I remember that my Spanish teacher told us a story about her sister in law.
She is a Christian and her husband is a Muslim.
They eventually got divorced because of the huge differences in religion and their lifestyles. She told us that when they were going to go to Rincon (I believe), he stopped the car in the middle of the highway to pray. When she visited his family, they'd eat from the same bowls and with their hands and such.
But that's a little overboard anyways, and I can see why she divorced him.
She is a Christian and her husband is a Muslim.
They eventually got divorced because of the huge differences in religion and their lifestyles. She told us that when they were going to go to Rincon (I believe), he stopped the car in the middle of the highway to pray. When she visited his family, they'd eat from the same bowls and with their hands and such.
But that's a little overboard anyways, and I can see why she divorced him.
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
I think if someone is really, really religious and its a big part of their life then it matters, but if someone believes in God and their partner doesn't its not really a massive issue.
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
For me it would depend on the religion. I'm an atheist and so I could never date someone who is eextremely religious. Like I could never ever see myself with a Muslim or a Mormon. For a lot of them their religion consumes their whole life and their beliefs would clash with mine too much.
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
Im catholic born and raised. dont really give a flying fuck what religion someone is. i married a pagen or whatever bullshit he thought he was each week...and now im dating an atheist. really i could care less i will never ask or force anyone to go with me. its not a huge deal...being catholic and going to church to me like brushing my teeth or taking a piss i have to do it.
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
I'm Agnostic and my boyfriend is Athiest. We get along just swell. I think conflict arising would have a lot to do with religious ceremonies more than anything (getting married in a church or not, having kids baptized or not, etc). I use Christian examples because that's what my background is, not in an attempt to exclude!
Since neither Agnostics nor Athiests have particular religious ceremonies or daily 'rules' to follow, there's not a lot of areas to conflict.
Since neither Agnostics nor Athiests have particular religious ceremonies or daily 'rules' to follow, there's not a lot of areas to conflict.
- loveanddestroyxo
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Re: Being in a Relationship With Someone of A Different Reli
I'm Catholic and my boyfriend was raised as a Jehovah's Witness.
He doesn't practice it really but does identify himself as one. His parents are very into it. For a while his mom seemed to dislike me when she found out I was Catholic. For a while his dad tried to shove his beliefs down my throat. It was difficult, but they seem to have accepted the fact that their son is in love with a Catholic girl. My family doesn't care. They just want me to be happy.
Sometimes we talk about religion... I tell him my beliefs he tells me his. I tell him what I think of his and he tells me what he thinks of mine. I know if we get married and have children there will be many more obstacles (married in a church, baptizing our children) but, I guess the fact that he doesn't really practice it makes a difference. If he was into it as much as his parents well... we probably wouldn't be together.
He doesn't practice it really but does identify himself as one. His parents are very into it. For a while his mom seemed to dislike me when she found out I was Catholic. For a while his dad tried to shove his beliefs down my throat. It was difficult, but they seem to have accepted the fact that their son is in love with a Catholic girl. My family doesn't care. They just want me to be happy.
Sometimes we talk about religion... I tell him my beliefs he tells me his. I tell him what I think of his and he tells me what he thinks of mine. I know if we get married and have children there will be many more obstacles (married in a church, baptizing our children) but, I guess the fact that he doesn't really practice it makes a difference. If he was into it as much as his parents well... we probably wouldn't be together.