Bitterella - 280390 hurdles to a bump and a ring part 65

[Gem_woody]

Contrary to the opinions, I still don't think Alfie loves her (anymore). I think he did and only recently has it disappeared.

He's just with her for convenience now. If they break up it will be a disaster - who keeps Nala, who keeps the house, the offices, everything. It's just easier to avoid that hassle and stay with her.

Jesus, what a bleak life

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I feel like it's easier for them to break up than most people. They have financial freedom, they don't need each other. Lots of normal people have to consider how they'd survive and pay their rent alone etc. Not a problem for zalfie!

[thehippiechick]

Contrary to the opinions, I still don't think Alfie loves her (anymore). I think he did and only recently has it disappeared.

He's just with her for convenience now. If they break up it will be a disaster - who keeps Nala, who keeps the house, the offices, everything. It's just easier to avoid that hassle and stay with her.

Zoe if they ever break up:

[sonnenschein]

So true about Zoe being a never thought for Alfie. I cringed beyond belief when Zoe asked Alfie what he liked most about the trip and he said “that it wasn’t work related and we literally didn’t work”. Proves they didn’t appreciate any culture / different surroundings whatsoever and could have just eaten pizza in bed at home and gained the same experience. Having ordered food to the Air Bnb the previous night, then had McDonalds AND takeaway pizza AND room service the following day. What a waste of money the trip was.





#beautyguru


she looks terrifying



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[Hem848484]

I actually felt really sorry for Zoe in her Amsterdam vlog. She seems to still love Alfie and hes just completely indifferent.

I thought it was sad (but not surprising) that he wasn’t thoughtful enough to get her a card for vday. He’s too far up his own ass to be a good partner.

[emeraldswifi]

I feel she's trying to push this adult changeover

- The fact she kept that joke
Zoe: "My lips are freezing"
Alfie: "Which ones"

- Drinking champagne though she doesn't like it

- Going to museums eg Banksy/Anne Frank/Sex museum

- Zoe also needs to stop over ordering food. She knows she can't finish it

- Love the fact Zoe said she'd take a bath then they'd go back out shopping. But Alfie just said he'll go without her whilst she's in the bath. Alfie "Fck Zoe - Let be buy watches"

- OT Alfie has NEVER READ Anne Frank and thought Anne was in her mid twenties??? Is he fucking inept????

- A part of me dies when she says "Gorgeous"

- Getting a Mcdonalds in Amsterdam. Alfie tried playing it off "No. We have...." then shut up as they haven't had any Dutch food

- Alfie talking about the sex museum "I wasn't expecting that"
Zoe "I went to learn" --- no you didn't...you and Alfie have Asda Smartprice vanilla sex once a year...it lasts 2 mins and Alfie screams Savage at the end

- Of course she spotted the shop that said its only 313 days to Christmas. LIVE IN THE MOMENT FOR ONCE ZOE.



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I think 'Asda Smartprice vanilla sex' is the best choice of words I've ever heard

[sandsgoldd]

She should just bloody change her channel name to ASOS.

[GothMoth]

Imo Alfie’s never seemed ‘in love’ with Zoe. I feel like he was in awe with her because of her sub count and would’ve done anything to get into some sort of relationship with her. And idek what she saw in him.. desperate to be in a relationship? He no doubt treated her better than Wilf did.

I do not think Alfie genuinely wants some ‘young, adventurous girl’. He’d want that for image purposes, but he’s boring & lazy like he has always been. He pretends to be adventurous (if you can even call it that) for da viewzzz. He’s learnt from a very young age that views/social media recognition is all that matters. Getting married & having kids is real life. He can’t just pretend for social media for da viewzz. He doesn’t want commitments (even though hea making them). His situation atm can be changed much more easily than a marriage & kids can. Also soz if this should be on Alfies thread.

I do think Zoe loves Alfie but idk why. On camera he’s a right berk @ off camera in the background he looks like a depressed sloth. I do wonder if that is what he is like completely off camera. Probably just thinks about his sub count. In the beginning he looked like a baby & had no experience in anything and only had drive to up his sub count. He lacked and still lacks substance.

Its definitely not too late for Zoe to meet someone else & have kids. 27 is still young. Its sad that she (and tbh Alfie) has no real desire anymore to go and just live & are too sheltered/uninterested to really want to do something worth while.

And for someone who has been doing YT for ages and has enough money for many lifetimes.. would progress her channel and stop posting asos crap & monthly favourites. It just shows again she has no real desire to change & is more comfortable having her name, image & reputation sink for a quick buck.

[PrettyInATeacup]

she has the worst fashion sense ever, how the hell has she got so many followers.

[sonnenschein]

“Huge haul (with some major fails)” no Zoe, everything you wore in Amsterdam was a major fail

A f-ing unitard and more polka dots, THE HORROR



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[Hem848484]

Today’s video is an ASOS haul? Jesus take the wheel... I haven’t watched it yet and probably won’t. That is so fucking lazy.

[sonnenschein]

And a “go away” embroidered hat - more passive aggressive #girlboss

“I’m not bossy I’m the BOOSSSSS - Beyoncé”

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[sweetcorn]

I feel she's trying to push this adult changeover

- The fact she kept that joke
Zoe: "My lips are freezing"
Alfie: "Which ones"

- Drinking champagne though she doesn't like it

- Going to museums eg Banksy/Anne Frank/Sex museum

- Zoe also needs to stop over ordering food. She knows she can't finish it

- Love the fact Zoe said she'd take a bath then they'd go back out shopping. But Alfie just said he'll go without her whilst she's in the bath. Alfie "Fck Zoe - Let be buy watches"

- OT Alfie has NEVER READ Anne Frank and thought Anne was in her mid twenties??? Is he fucking inept????

- A part of me dies when she says "Gorgeous"

- Getting a Mcdonalds in Amsterdam. Alfie tried playing it off "No. We have...." then shut up as they haven't had any Dutch food

- Alfie talking about the sex museum "I wasn't expecting that"
Zoe "I went to learn" --- no you didn't...you and Alfie have Asda Smartprice vanilla sex once a year...it lasts 2 mins and Alfie screams Savage at the end

- Of course she spotted the shop that said its only 313 days to Christmas. LIVE IN THE MOMENT FOR ONCE ZOE.



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I think 'Asda Smartprice vanilla sex' is the best choice of words I've ever heard

ASOSELLA (?) - 280390 milliseconds of Asda Smartprice vanilla sex

hahahahahahha

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[Slackerbitch]

Asosella 280390 unfitting 80s clothes
Asosella 280390 affiliate links
Asosella 280390 ways to dress like a toddler

[rai1234]

She wants to ruin this already arguably ugly jumpsuit by wearing a white t-shirt underneath? What?

[Luk20]

The older Zoe gets the more clear it is to me how out her depth she really is.

I'm not saying everyone needs a uni education, but most people seem driven to learn more about the things they care about. For instance, in her Amsterdam vlog she claims that she read Anne Frank's diary multiple times, but then has no real commentary or insight to share about actually being there. I'm not expecting a history report, but if she was really that into it and had read it multiple times you'd think she'd have something more profound / educated to share instead of it just being 'cool' - like everything else.

It's just one example, but this seems to be a reoccurring thing. It's become more obvious how little she actually knows about the things she's supposedly interested in - business, photography, fashion, design, etc. etc. She'll say she likes them, but never offers up any educated insight into any of them. Even her meetings seem to be directed entirely by other people with her only really being qualified to say yes or no to colour options, etc. She wants her audience to believe she's an expert at face value, but it's glaringly obvious she lacks any practical experience.

[Slackerbitch]

"I have a very tiny waist" yes, we know, everything about you is tiny, can we move on thumbelina?

[mozza74]

"I have a very tiny waist" yes, we know, everything about you is tiny, can we move on thumbelina?

Thumberella!

[tiffanyatbreakfast]

Did anyone else wonder if her PA or someone made the ASOS order for her? She literally looked at each item like it was the first time she was seeing it!

Also where the fuck is she gonna wear that polka dot jumpsuit

[rai1234]

Did anyone else wonder if her PA or someone made the ASOS order for her? She literally looked at each item like it was the first time she was seeing it!

Also where the fuck is she gonna wear that polka dot jumpsuit

That's what I thought! She says she had "forgotten" what she bought and that she made the order when she got back from Amsterdam. They haven't been back for very long. I thought either someone else made the order for her or ASOS straight up sent her the stuff. She looked genuinely confused every time she opened something new.

[revenga]

EVERY asos item is an affiliate link so yeah...she didnt do it.