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Parents do not approve

Parents do not approve

Postby yankydoo » Tue Feb 14, 2017 4:58 am

I can't believe I am saying this at the age of 30, but I am in the process of arguing with my parents regarding my boyfriend.

I am middle eastern. I am divorced from an Indian guy. Parents at the time were fine with my marriage but they blame the culture clash for the breakdown of the marriage.

I have moved on and met a Caribbean guy. Parents are basically disgusted with me and all because of his skin colour. I know it is so awful and I cannot believe they are like that but coming from a middle eastern background, unfortunately it is common.

They have called me desperate and insecure.

The guy is lovely and we are serious.

It's still all early days but I know this time it is going to be a battle, and I will forever be the black sheep and will get crappy comments etc. It is much worse due to my failed marriage (I am not proud of being so young and divorced but I had my reasons).

Does anyone have any experience of this? One minute I am defiant and cannot believe my parents but I must admit I do not know how I can go through life and my parents putting us down. I also feel it may grind down our relationship.

Any advice or similar experiences would be appreciated.
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Re: Parents do not approve

Postby Apdz22 » Fri Jun 16, 2017 11:14 am

I'm sorry you're going through this... but at the end of the day, do what's right in your heart. If he truly is an awesome guy, you both will overcome the culture clash/difficulties. Best of luck!
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Re: Parents do not approve

Postby So_Yesterday » Mon Jun 19, 2017 9:51 am

My parents absolutely hates my partner... We've lived together for 3 years, and my mum literally ignores him when she walks into our house. Saying that, my parents are literally the worst, so I've learned to accept that kind of bs and just move on with my life.

I think in your situation they might just be worried that the 'culture shock' thing might happen again. Maybe sit down with them and explain your own feelings about the situation and hows it's different etc.

At the end of the day you're an adult and it's your choice, and if they can't respect that it's their problem.
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Re: Parents do not approve

Postby So_Yesterday » Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:06 pm

Also, I understand how difficult it is to deal with parents putting your relationship down constantly. I think that's one of the things you need to explain when you sit down etc.

At the end of the day it's your life to live, and they shouldn't be trying to get in the way.
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